valera_kolpakov (valera_kolpakov) wrote,
valera_kolpakov
valera_kolpakov

You have to sleep with no underwear "чтобы писька дышала".

Замечательный вебсайт, показанный мне старшей дочерью, где русско-американская молодежь жалуется на своих совковых родителей: http://www.russianproblems.com/

Ниже я помещаю некоторые перлы, которые к сожалению на английском, ибо молодежь, конечно, общается друг с другом по английски. Узнаёте себя, господа иммигранты? Я вот дочери точно в рот палец совал, когда она зевала.

Your household has to have at least 3 pairs of Adidas velcro strap tapotchki, and you almost always see them being worn with socks.

If you whistle inside, you're screwed.

When your American boyfriend visits, your papa immediately takes off his tapochki and gives them to him. Your mama is hustling to find more tapochki around the house so everyone's feet are covered.

As any Russian adult insists, you MUST have a bowl of soup daily. Otherwise, you will be plagued with a variety of health issues, including but not limited to: your intestines drying out and shriveling up, persistent constipation, abdominal pain, and uclers.

You have to sleep with no underwear "shtobi peeska dishala".

Every time you yawn and don't close your mouth, your dad tries to stick his finger in it.

When your dad asks you something & you don't hear him so you say "a?" & he responds "бэ!"

You have at least one picture of you with a MASSIVE WHITE BOW on top of your head.

Everytime you compliment someone or say something positive, you might jinx them, so you always have to spit three times "ptu ptu ptu SHTOB NE ZGLAZAT!"

After accidentally stepping on your friend's foot, you have to make sure they step on yours "so you won't fight." I remember many a day chasing my American friends around begging them to "Step on my foot!" or explaining to them that I "Need" to step on their foot if they stepped on mine.

When you grow up and realize you've been eating cows tongue.

Getting a cut or a scrape means you have to put ether "iod" or "zelenka" on it. Ether way you look like a yellow/orange or green spotted freak.

Thanksgiving dinner with your family is very confusing, you expect turkey,gravy,and mashed potatoes like a normal family, yet you are stuck with a big russian turkey your uncle made, plov, grechnivaya kasha and oliviyea salad.

When you throw out old bread your parents gasp and say, "shtob boh prastil!" even though it's moldy and absolutely inedible!
Subscribe
promo valera_kolpakov march 21, 2013 15:21 484
Buy for 3 000 tokens
Давайте знакомиться. Краткая информация про меня: 1) Я работаю стоматологом в Америке, но родом из России. На стоматолога я выучился уже в Америке, в России заканчивал медицинский, год был патологоанатомом, потом занимался наукой, защитил диссертацию. 2) Из России уехал в январе 1992 года по…
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

  • 44 comments
Previous
← Ctrl ← Alt
Next
Ctrl → Alt →
Previous
← Ctrl ← Alt
Next
Ctrl → Alt →